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Some editing

Getty Ritter 3 years ago
parent
commit
4549156ac5
1 changed files with 4 additions and 4 deletions
  1. 4 4
      examples/mini.rakonteto

+ 4 - 4
examples/mini.rakonteto

@@ -5,7 +5,7 @@ chickenshit (+no yes)
 === intro ===
 
 Morpheus's face is impassive behind his mirror-like sunglasses. He
-nods at his hands, each of which has a shining oblong object: a
+nods at his hands, each of which holds a tiny oblong object: a
 pill. One is red, one is blue. Do you take the blue pill? Or do you
 take the red pill?
 
@@ -25,7 +25,7 @@ away, and you eye the other pill in his palm.
 Your fingers tremble as you grab the blue pill. Morpheus's hand
 lingers for a moment.
 
-+ Snatch the red pill. -> [red_pill: have]
++ Snatch the red pill too. -> [red_pill: have]
 + Wuss out and take the pill. -> [chickenshit: yes]
 
 === [blue_pill: have, red_pill: lack, chickenshit: yes] ===
@@ -48,7 +48,7 @@ yellow ones."
 You put the pill into your mouth and you begin to feel the world
 around you reform itself into pure information before dissolving
 violently into digital nothingness. After what could be seconds or
-what could be an eternity, you find yourself emerged in a pool of
+what could be an eternity, you find yourself emerging from a pool of
 orange goo, covered in digital connectors. The pod is vacated, and the
 goo carries your body through pipes and futuristic tubing until you
 are found by a junky, floating vehicle. When the hatch opens, you are
@@ -69,7 +69,7 @@ His piercing eyes turn to meet your gaze. "Yes," he says.
 You have both pills. In the moment before you down them, you see for
 the first time a hint of human emotion in Morpheus, a facial
 expression which even behind those impassive sunglasses conveys the
-universally appreciable emotion: "What the fuck, man?"
+universally appreciable sentiment: "What the fuck, man?"
 
 You open palm slam both pills directly into your fuckin' gob. Let's
 go, man.